My brother Reuben and his wife Meggan will soon have a little girl (for now, known as Tamale Jalapeno) and I’m so excited! For this Fathers Day, I asked some of the dads I know to give me their quotes, advice, and stories on fatherhood. I LOVE the responses I got; these are proud dads, for sure. My very creative friend/coworker Dana made a beautiful book with the following quotes and by the time you’re reading this, my brother will have the book. I hope you enjoy these as much as I have. Of course, I especially I LOVE the ones from my dad; they made me laugh and cry.

Happiest Fathers Day to my Daddy, to my brother Reuben, my boyfriend Kelly (glad you have the boys for this whole weekend), all of the dads that contributed, and ALL of the other dads out there.

Chris:
Something I am experiencing right now with Noah (4), is a testing of the boundaries of discipline. I’m finding an effective technique in dealing with this is to always make sure I give him a choice. The choice is, “It’s either my way, or no way.” Of course this only works about 50% of the time, but that’s better than nothing.

Don:

• For me, there is no way to describe the feeling of coming home from work and your child being at the front door, with a smile, saying “Daddy’s home”.
• No matter how much you try, you end up doing or saying the same thing your dad had when you were little.
• Having patience is easier said then done.

Mike:
Without sounding condescending, it is so surreal that the little brother of one of my best friends in high school is now going to be a dad! Congratulations! Michelle has told me you are married and doing very well – I never expected anything else!

As for fatherly advice, the only thing I can say is that your child will always be the great equalizer. No matter how good or bad your day is, when you come home at the end of the day, nothing will equal the great feeling you get when your little one comes running across the house yelling “Daddy” and gives you a great big hug!

As for the rest, you’ll learn it on the fly – or from the What to Expect When Expecting series!!

Congrats again and Happy Father’s Day!

Jerremy:

• The most important relationship that a child can have is not one that the child has with its parent, but rather the relationship that their parents have with each other.
• Be your own person – Knowing yourself and doing the things you like makes teaching a kid to do these things much more natural.
• Drink…….  Alot – Hard Liquor is best
• Grandparents have already raised their children; do NOT let them raise yours.

Bo:

• PATIENCE:  No one is born with it, but once a parent, you can never have too much of it.

Rick:

• Always tell them how proud you are of them.

Frank:

Here are some random observations I’ve made during my time as a father of two girls. Three out of five fathers may or may not agree with me.

• Puke, snot and slobber no longer illicit any reaction other than to calmly reach over my shoulder and grab a burp rag.
• Talking to your kids like they are adults and playing with them like you are a kid produces the best results.
• If my daughter wakes up grumpy, I do my best to irritate her until she either smiles or storms off to the bathroom. Either way, her mood changes!
• Girls are born with the knowledge that daddy is wrapped around their little finger.

Kelly:

• Spare change thrown out on the lawn and Vaseline on the door knob will buy you about ten minutes of private time =)
• One of the greatest days in a dads life is when your child can wipe their own ass.
• A Hug from your kid is one of the best things ever.
• When baiting a hook, make sure the little one doesn’t run by and snag the line. The hook will always find its way to your finger.
• Homemade gifts are the best from kids.

Our Dad:

• Are boys and girls different?  I remember a time when several five year old girls were all playing quietly outside, and Reuben, a three year old, grabbed a water hose, turned it on, and started chasing the girls with it.  Who, but a boy, would think of taunting the girls like this?
• When I was very young, I was called Sam.  I didn’t know for years that Sam wasn’t my name.  My sister, Leslie, when she was upset with me, called me Samuel J. Chicken Hawk.  It was even longer before I was old enough to put two and two together and learned that my nick-name came from the cartoon with Samuel J. Chicken Hawk. This little bird got into a lot of trouble every day; I got into a lot of trouble every day.  I am not sure, although I think that nick-names may be a good idea.  I think they can be a special name between a father and daughter that can make her feel special.
• Oh, how I remember the first time we made Smores, roasting marshmallows on an open fire.
• A Dad must remember to ‘make memories’ for his children.  There’s that first visit to a museum, the first swimming pool, the zoo, etc.
• I think every child should have a flashlight to keep next to her bed.  There might be scary noises or shadows in the night.  It also helps her to play after scheduled bed time.
• My father had the idea that each teen should participate in one sport per year and play an instrument each year.  This will prevent nerds and jocks.
• Let ‘em cry for a few hours when newborn; they’ll then sleep night well knowing they cannot summon you when they’re bored.
• Teach Bible stories early.
• Make her earn an allowance.
• When a teenager, give her budget to buy school cloths; she may not choose the $100 tennis shoes then…
• Let her experiment a bit, but don’t let her go overboard (e.g. Goth, etc.).
• Set bedtime hours that get later with age.
• How about half an hour each school night to read a book of her choosing?
• Don’t reward tattling on siblings.
• Never argue with your wife in front of children.
• Always ask her if she asked Mom before she asked you.
• Don’t assign punishment immediately; try to wait an hour to hash it over in your brain and talk with wife first.
• Don’t spank with an object; always use hands.
• If you paddle her at 2 years old, you may never need to do it again after 4.
• Reward good grades (e.g. As); retrain bad grades (e.g. Ds and Fs) with extra homework (e.g. looking up words in a dictionary and writing down definitions.
• Buy video games that educate (e.g Super Mario Brothers Alphabet).
• Paste Stars and Planets that glow in the dark on her bedroom ceiling.
• Teach her to swim at a young age.
• Teach her to ride a bike early; then encourage her to explore on it.
• Teach her to cook at a young age.  One of those kids’ ovens that cook with a light bulb is a good start.
• Take her to Grandpa’s place and teach her to drive at 14.
• Take her camping often.
• Keep the TVs and computers in family rooms no matter how old they get.
• Make Sunday night dinners a must for all to be present.
• Give her a long solo summer trip to relatives ay 16; it’ll teach independence.
• Don’t let her date a boy that is old enough to drive until she is old enough to drive.
• Don’t let kids beg for anything while in a store.  Don’t let begging be rewarded.
• Somehow teach her to like fruits and vegetables.
• Make her eat everything on her plate; don’t let her develop ‘don’t likes’ until a teenager; make sure she has a small plate though.
• You are her parents, not her friends; you can be friends when they are adults.
• Teach her to tithe 10% of her allowance.
• Teach her to do her own laundry; it teaches responsibility.
• Teach her to make her own bed.
• Teach her to analyze both sides of a debate.
• If she cries for no reason, give her a reason.
• Teach her silly songs.
• Hang her pictures on the Fridge.
• Let Grandma spoil her.
• Mark her growing on a wall.
• It’s OK to say ‘no’.
• Teach the ‘honor system’, and don’t abuse it by asking those questions that require a lie or punishment.
• Teach her to play with bugs when she is young.
• Tie her gloves together through her jacket sleeves.
• Only speak positive words; a negative word can end up a curse; never forget.
• Make up a family recipe if you have to; then teach her; she’ll appreciate the legacy.
• Buy her a globe
• Volunteer to be a class trip chaperone.
• Make sure your bedroom door has a lock.
• Give her something to trade in her school lunch.
• Teach her games to play on car trips, like counting types of cars, etc.
• Play Scrabble.
• Help her to collect something (e.g Stamps, Pennies, etc.).
• Teach her to not call adults by their first name, or at least use Mr. Jason if not Mr. Pearson.
• Let her eat dirt; she’ll survive.